Marc's Hands

it's friday night and i'm totally awesome, right? so i'm at this killer party and there are girls everywhere and....no, no. I'm sitting outside my coffee shop internetting.

when my roommate and I arrived, there were two men two tables over. one was older maybe 65, the other mmm, late 30 early 40s. i took from their conversation and his accent that he hadn't been in the states very long. the younger of the two was bring this man up to speed on how to think now that he's in america. I didn't hear much what the older man said because he's from another country and wasn't talking so loudly that everyone around him could hear, like we american's do, but younger, louder fella it seemed like the older gentleman was pretty traditional in thought. loud talker kept saying, "your mind is just stuck in Bulgaria, but you're in america now." i heard talk of how marriage doesn't mean anything anymore and other selfish, hopeless banter.
"c'mon, you guys should be out partying," the 40 year old told us in passing, bring back a fresh cup of coffee. after basically begging the him to go to his apartment and get a game (something like backgammon, i think, but i don't remember the name) so that the younger guy would have something to do tonight, the older guy declined and took off for the night. i listened for a while as our 40-year-old loud talker dialed some unsuspecting friend (with his hands free headset) and proceeded to give him a lecture on the economics of the coffee shop business, chain smoking the whole time. then i put on my headphones and put on Led Zeppelin I (which i'm really into right now, by the way). when he was out of people to call he left for a bit to grab another pack of cigarettes.
now, all the while i was sitting hear jamming to zep reading blogs, doing internet banking and the like. while i was reading one particular blog (the 'David Dark, the Kingdom, and Hospitality' post) i started thinking about how this guy 10 feet from me was probably really lonely and could use some hope-filled conversation. and i in all my hopefilledness was just sitting here pretending to block everyone out cuz i had things to do and was annoyed by his loud talking. i got convicted, and i was trying to think of a way to break into conversation with him he left. a few minutes later a pair of dudes about my age sat down and found a bottle in a paper sack that the other fella had apparently picked up when he went for cigarettes. he started making fun of the fact that someone had been drinking outside of the coffee shop, and I immediately chimed in with, "yeah, i think he smoked a pack and a half while he was here. ha ha, he seemed kinda lonely."

all that to say, do better than me. look up from your magazine, computer screen, or book. take out your headphones and talk to the person next to you whom you have just judged and whose probably hurting, and could use a little hope and a smile. and i'll try to do better next time.